Dear Arthur,
I started dating an older woman and in the beginning things were perfect; she was mature, she gave me my space, and she was just a fun person to be around. As things started to progress between us, she started talking more and more about having kids and all this stuff about her biological clock. She is 37 and I am 26 – to be quite honest about it I don’t think I want children right now…with her. Am I a bad person?
– Signed, Almost out of time
You’re dealing with a ticking biological time bomb: Waiting to explode with babies and diapers everywhere! If this isn’t your thing, respect her enough and move on. Otherwise you’ll be knee deep in PTA meetings and homework with a woman who is probably 10 years younger than your mother.
I salute you for being brave enough to engage in cougar hunting. There’s nothing more beautiful and poetic than vintage vagina. However, it’s obvious that you’ve grown bored with it and her because she wants a serious relationship. And, now you want out because she wants a commitment in the form of a child!
A good friend of mine once told me that a woman generally feels the need to have a baby when she feels a guy is drifting away. I agree with this statement and since you stated that you do not “want children right now…with her” that further illustrates the point.
This mature older woman knows this. However, her ego doesn’t want to view this as yet another failed attempt at starting a family. A decision has to be made before a child is brought into the mix, rather intentionally or not! No one will come across as a bad person as long as you’re both honest!