How do you get an UT graduate off your porch?
Pay him for the pizza
It was reported that Oklahoma head football coach Bob Stoops will only be dressing twenty players for the Texas game. The rest of the players will have to get dressed by themselves.
What does the average UT student get on his SAT?
Drool.
Did you hear about the power outage at the University of Oklahoma library?
Forty students were stuck on the escalator for three hours.
Why do University of Texas fans keep their diplomas on their dashboards?
So they can park in handicap spaces.
Why do Sooners hate M&Ms?
They’re too hard to peel.
Why doesn’t Texas have water on the sidelines?
Because the kid with the recipe graduated.